1st Doc visit after the diagnosis

I was able to move up my appointment to Thursday after I had found out on Tuesday. It was a 4:00 appointment and we both went. Doctor Polsky came in with papers, some for me and some he read from. It was the results of the biopsy. There were 5 piece of paper stapled together and the front sheet contained pictures and graphs and lots of "doctor-eese". The word my eyes were drawn to was on the right side, half way down....in bold type and bookended with asterics ***MALIGNANT*** That was the one word on that page that I knew exactly what meant.

Doctor Polsky was so good, so patient and so caring. Im sure he had done this many time but he made me, made us feel that we were special, he cared especially for me and my situation. I guess that was the first of many times God would show his face through others. We talked of options and treatment plans and yes, even had a few more tears, Brenda was not doing well with this thing so far. I left that day with a book, two DVDs and my mind full of more information than I thought I would ever need or want to know about prostates and prostate cancer.

My family knew I was supposed to go to see the doc on Monday so seeing him on Thursday before gave me some time to prepare for how and when I will tell them. I think telling my sons was the most difficult of all. The are both very different men and express their emotions differently. We all handled it well and I did not cry, my greatest fear in having to tell them. The both asked if there is anything they could do, promised to help me/us in any way they could and accepted my reassurance that everything would be OK. Telling Momma and Daddy was hard too but again, I kept it together and the same with brother Dean. I am so lucky to have a family that I know loves me in spite of all my failures and the many times I have disappointed them. My daughters-in-law have called and been supportive and my sister-in-law too. Most times I feel like they are not inlaws at all...they are really family. My inlaws in Florida have called and given their support too. Brenda's Dad Gene is a prostate cancer survivor now. I have finally told them all that we will have no more tears, no sappy stuff and sentimental accounts of days gone by or yet to come. As a matter of fact, I gave Brenda til 10:00 PM on Thursday night to be done with it! NO MORE TEARS !