Tuesday, December 2nd

Friends and Family,

Good "frosty" morning to all. Sorry I did not get around to posting anything yesterday...it was not a real good day. Had to have my catheter irrigated again but was no big deal. I do get anxious about it and tend to fear the worst is yet to come but it worked fine and I was spared any great discomfort. I have struggled lately with where to put the fear that wells up inside me just thinking about how bad it hurt before. I have read and have heard Preacher Rick say that faith and fear cannot occupy the same place. I know my faith is real but I know too my fear is real. How can I say that I have faith in God to heal me and that everything will be OK and in the next breath say I am afraid I am going to have an episode of such horrible pain. I have prayed for an answer and some understanding but it is not a clear picture for me yet........

The steri-strips that covered my incisions have all fallen off and most of the scabs are gone too, I have some pretty good scars on my belly now. I have said it will take alot of Coppertone to get them covered up this summer! Showers and dressing are getting easier now too as I have gotten into my routine and know what must be done and in what order. I don't know why but my skin is so very dry now. Once my belly heals completely I want to take a bath with some good ole baby oil and get good and slicked up. Hopefully that won't be as long as it has been?

Today I missed another bible study with my brothers at the IHOP. I was so looking forward to it today but am not comfortable taking this catheter bag into a restaurant and the leg bag that is very easy to conceal is just not comfortable. So, I will look forward to next week.

The choir's Christmas Program is in less than two weeks now. The music is beautiful and Cheryl has worked so hard on it but I will be missing it too. I have always said..."if ya don't practice, ya don't play". I have not been able to practice and this late in the game I can never learn it well enough to sing with them. I have every intention of being there listening though.

Yesterday I spent some time on some Prostate Cancer Awareness web sites. I have ordered some things for me and some things to share with others too.

Am thinking some cheesy grits sound good for breakfast this morning. Something nice and warm as I am cold so much of the time now it seems. At last check, I had lost over 20lbs since going into the hospital. Wasn't the best way to lose it but am glad I did and hopefully will keep it off.

Think I am done for this posting...yea, the hand is still numb. I may try to get in to see my ortho doc this week and maybe a shot of cortisone will fix it?

Thank you again for all your prayers. Please continue to remember me and all those everywhere who are sick and hurting. I have seen alot of treatments and had alot of medicines over the past 3 weeks but NONE have had a greater effect on me than PRAYERS !

I Love You All.....thank you ..... and Thank You Lord for Your blessings on Me.

Mike